7 Habits of Highly
Successful Teens
(By Sean Covey but
modified)
Habit 5: Seek First to
Understand, and then to be Understood
Because most people don’t listen very well,
one of the great frustrations in life is that many don’t feel understood. This habit
will ensure your teen learns the most important communication skills there is:
active listening.
Why is this habit they to communication? It’s
because the deepest need of the human heart is to be understood. Everyone wants
to be respected and valued for who they are—a unique, one-of-a-kind,
never-to-be-cloned individual. People won’t expose their soft middles unless
they feel genuine love and understanding. Once they feel it, however, they will
tell you more than you may want to hear. People don’t care how much you know
until they know how much you care.
Listen with your eyes, heart and ears. 7
percent of communication is contained in the words we use. The rest comes from
body language (53 percent) and how we say words, or the tone and feeling
reflected in our voice (40 percent).
Most people are eager to talk and had
rather talk than listen. We have one mouth and two ears. This means we should
listen twice as much as we talk. We actually learn more while listening rather
than how much we talk. Learn to listen and listen to learn.
Listen, really listen, for understanding.
Seek first to understand then to be
understood—LISTEN.
